Sometimes What Feels Like Death Is a Rebirth: How Ceremonial Cacao, a Spiral, and I Became WANA HEY Co-Founders

CACAO CEREMONY in nature WANA HEY ceremonial cacao — Photo by Jordan SpottedElk for WANA HEY

I can’t believe we’re here. I’ve started a ceremonial chocolate brand.

What felt like rock bottom became the portal to my biggest rebirth — and to a creative force I didn’t know I had access to.

This desire has lived in my heart for years, but I hadn’t heard the clear guidance to act.

As I hold my custom shaped ceremonial chocolate spiral bars and one-pound bags of ceremonial cacao roses… It feels surreal. I’ve made products before, but never something with this much prayer woven into every layer: the visuals, the words, the recipe, the sourcing. If you feel called, I can’t wait for you to experience it!

In this episode, I’m sharing the behind-the-scenes journey, the mystical seeds that were planting themselves even when I didn’t know what was happening.

It truly feels like my Higher Self traveled back in time, dropped breadcrumbs, and asked me to follow symbols and signs. One of those signs was a spiral in the dirt that became the center of the brand.

Thank you for being here. I’m excited to be back podcasting. Interviews are coming, and while the cadence might be a bit fluid at first, it will be far more consistent than the past couple of years.

Inside this episode:

The moment I made chocolate in my kitchen “just to feel better” — and how it became the most nourishing creation of my life.
The years-long thread of ceremonial cacao weaving through my journey — from Bali to New York, from marriage to motherhood, from loss to devotion.
My intuitively guided path to finding an ethical Peruvian cacao supplier — and why I turned down the easy option that looked perfect on paper but lacked care.
How I learned that real spirituality looks like care — in sourcing, in communication, in how you hold every being along the way.
The symbolism of the spiral that appeared in the forest and became the heartbeat of the brand — a living reminder of remembering, forgetting, and returning.
The way my own name, Ksenia, holds the hidden meaning of Theoxenia — “entertaining gods through food” — and how that revealed my deeper calling to work with chocolate the main compound of which is Theobromine, “food of the Gods”
How the channeled WANA HEY recipe came together
What it looks like to walk the path of creative surrender — trusting that every step, delay, and detour was a piece of divine choreography.
The 1,000-pound leap of faith: investing $40,000 of my own money, saying yes to the unknown, and birthing a brand that feels like a living prayer.
How I’m redefining “launching” as a soft opening of a portal — an invitation to create, remember, and rise softer together.